In a year 8 class today - in fact in pretty much every class ever - a number of pupils were dicussing "who fancies whom". Their best way of figuring out whether or not someone likes someone was if they could look them in the eye and say they didn't fancy them without laughing. I daresay the system was flawed by half a dozen accusing eyes staring at the situation, making nervous laughter amongst the protagonists inevitable.

Briefly it made think: Oh, teenage capes. What a lark! But then I thought: Hang on! Being a teenager in love sucks. The pain, the heartache, the misery, the "not in a million years freak!", the rejected last rolos.

Sooner them than me.