I wish kids didn't smoke. Then I wouldn't have to catch them when they do. On my breaktime duty I came across a gang of year elevens behind the sports hall, some of whom were puffing away like steam trains. Fortunately I was able to take the high ground, literally as they were in the dug out area near the fire exit so I was a few metres above. This was just as well as otherwise I'd have been dwarved by them.

I'd come across some of them on a tough bottom set cover the previous day so even knew their names to report to the pastoral staff. One girl was very quick to point out that I hadn't actually seen her smoking so it wasn't fair for her to get into trouble. Methinks the lady doth protest too much, but in all fairness I hadn't seen her smoking so she was right. It would be a bit harsh to punish someone for not being caught even if the circumstances are a little suspicious. I'm not sure she believed me when I said I had no issue with her, perhaps she was even a little disappointed to miss out on a potential argument.

Another girl I'd been helping out in the corridor with some maths work last week. She doesn't go into her lessons much because she has depression. I felt a bit bad that she would be in trouble because she clearly has some major issues and couldn't quite bring myself to think of it as 'just doing my job', a phrase that can be used to justify anything from not letting someone on a bus with a dog to playing a part in genocide. But then I'm not the one who put the cigarette in her mouth and if they actually adopted some kind of lookout or listened for foosteps then they'd have the chance to stub out their fags and come up with some probably hilarious excuse for hiding out of view, with the smell of smoke in the air.

The logic of such breaktime duties is thus. We know that some kids smoke. What they do to their own lungs is really up to them. But we can't condone it. If we see it we must take action. If we suspect them smoking but don't see it then it is enough to get them back onto the main bit of the school site. In this situation we hope that the kids have the sense to realise that it isn't a good idea to smoke in that area because it is patrolled. So the idea of outdoor patrols like mine isn't to catch the pupils smoking to make the probability that they will get caught sufficiently high to act as a deterent.

If only the kids undestood this.